About
Despite having a way too long video introduction which goes over the cellular biology and some of the effects it has on my body, there is a massive amount of work behind the making of the fourth video called The Search for God: Part 4, The Matter and Body of God. This work’s analysis takes place at four levels:
These four elements came together to make the fourth video and inform the sequencing of movements shown there. The raw footage of me that composes part of the video is pulled from this project and the coloring is biased on the analysis in notes diagrams and writing of this project.
The project that is behind Part 4 of The Search for God is called The Document On My Muscles (DOMM).
History of the Document On My Muscles
It is difficult to say where the DOMM project first began. If one considers the Document of My Muscles to be any attempt I have made to find the reason for my myogenic abnormalities or any attempt to limit my abnormalities effect on me, then the answer would be it began when I was in grade one. But if you consider it the series of events or movements that created a wound which is somehow connected to a underlying mutation, and how I healed this wound, then the project could have two start dates, either 2014 or 2020. The reason for the two dates is because I first began experimenting with the usage of isolated workouts exercising asymmetrical muscle groups around 2014, but I failed to document that I was doing so. It was not until 2020 once most of the wound had been created that I began to attempt to articulate both what I was doing and how I was doing it. But, I like to think that DOMM began with my first attempt to articulate the problem I was facing and formulate a solution on my own.
Diagrams
My first attempt to aciculate the condition of my muscles was in the form of diagrams. I wanted to take a qualitative snap shot of the state of my muscles. In order to do this, I used color to represent whether particular muscle groups appeared to be strengthening or weakening, I then labeled the muscle groups with qualitative descriptions of what the muscle felt like at the stage of progression or regression I was experiencing. This was both in order to monitor my progress and to show what sort of condition my muscles were in before I began attempting again to change them further.
The diagram began with my shoulder blade. (Interestingly, as a infant and young child this was where my mutation was first detected, which I did not know at the time the diagrams were made, but only became aware of later through medical records.) To talk about what I got from the diagrams the ultimate insight was how particulars of muscle operate in relation to other particulars of muscle influencing excesses or deficiencies of the strength and well-being of the muscles in the corresponding particulars of muscle relative to each of them. It also showed me how there are actions that I do nearly involuntarily to relive tension or stress and actions that might feel good in the moment but can cause problems in the future.
The problem I was facing when I made these diagrams is the same as trying to untie a knot that had previously been attempted to be untied by forcefully blindly pulling apart it apart, which made the knot tighter and almost impossible to see how it could be untied.
Simply put, these diagrams were an attempt to look at the problems that my mutation and I had caused from my own inner point of view.
Over the next week and a bit, the diagrams were completed. The diagram below is what came out of this process. I colored it and filled out the writing largely counter-clockwise, but I did some jumping around based on particular agonists and their corresponding antagonists when needed. In the end, these diagrams emerged.
Posterior Diagram
Anterior Diagram
Right and Left Hand Diagram
Shortly after the completion of the above diagram I made these similar diagrams based of my hands. Human hands are vary complex things. they have small fine muscles with smaller numbers of motor units for each individual muscle, but nevertheless, still have a immense capacity for dexterity and movement. They have large quantities of motor neurons and sensory neurons as well. Moreover, they have been a focal point of the way that my mutation us expressed in my tissue. I now know that this is because of the smaller ratio of motor units to individual muscles. But the biggest reason I did separate detailed diagrams of my hand was that a hand can be bent and moved flexed and aligned more than any other part of the body and because it is so far away from the heart and moves so frequently, it can be manipulated more aggressively and with less concern for vascular health. My thinking was that the hand, the organ of spirit, would be the one to undo knot of primordial contraction that is actualized and expressed in my tissue by both mutation and actions.
However, I found that despite the diagrams appearing impressive, they were representationally lacking. They were useful for me to understand the sensuous experience emanating from my myosin, but the diagrams seemed to lack the capacities to show other people what was going on with me. Therefore, I realized that I would have to be able to tell someone else my problem and solution. But I was not sure how to do it. It is not easily said. Then I thought, if someone could just see what my muscles feel like, they might be able to understand my line of thinking and course of action. With this in mind, I began to record videos to document the movements of my muscles. I recorded footage for almost two years before I realized I had enough; this footage was used to provide raw footage for the fourth video.
Videos
The first of many recorded workouts, as I call them, was recorded on 1 December 2020 at 5:57 PM. I am showing you just one of these workouts here because they are shown throughout the fourth video, although the background is removed, and I am also limiting the number of workouts shown here because of the lack of sufficient storage on this website. I also really doubt that people would be willing to watch a lot of videos like this one.
Soon after recording my first video, I was regularly recording them most days. The project became habitual, and a large number of recordings were produced over about a two year period. I was not sure how I was going to use them. I tried to display them various ways to give more insight to the viewers into what I was thinking. I attached pieces of writing to some, others I made crude diagrams to go with them, and some I tried to video edit them using colors like the diagrams to represent visually inner movement and sensation, but I lacked sufficient video editing software and skill at the time.
I have made a gallery here, which shows snapshots from a small number of the videos, to give an you an idea of some of the different failed attempts to articulate the problem.
The videos ,which I still have most of, document a horror that I went through and still to a lessor extent am affected by. But despite showing that there is a problem, they offer little with regards to articulating what actually is going on. They look like random contortions and odd disconnected movements; however, I realized after going through them long enough that they are not random, and I am progressing in a somewhat predictable fashion.
Notes
Another way I tried to articulate the effects of my myogenic syndrome was in the form of notes written in notebooks. I called these notebooks Notes On My Muscles. There were several of these notebooks. Their contents’ worth are largely quite varied, ranging from reasonable documentation of my sensuous experience to worthless, borderline irrational garbage. With the irrational garbage notes, the issue is that my syndromes expression puts an uneven pressure on temples that can when sever make it difficult to focus and think, and this coupled with memories of a distant past reflecting the reality of my existence can overwhelm me and lead to me making mistakes and experiencing difficulties more frequently the more vigorously I move. This means that when I would try to take notes on my condition immediately or during a workout, it would be a bit like trying to take notes while being punched firmly in the head.
Sample Photos of Notes On My Muscles
Documents
The main thrust of The Document On My Muscles Project came in a lengthy word document called The Complete Theory of My Muscles. It gives a detailed but incomplete history of my particular myogenic syndrome and some of the early investigations into it. It goes through many of the exercises that I have performed in my efforts to improve the strength of my muscles across my lifetime. Further, it attempts to offer a theory of causation which, however, has been shown to be not fundamental by genetic studies that took place more recently. The most important feature of A Complete Theory of My Muscles is that it offers a theory of movement that I have applied to great success. This success is measured in my ability to do things that I was never able to do before. One example of this occurred just this year in 2025. During an eye exam, the doctor noticed that I was able to look left, which I had never been able to do previously.
A lot of the work about documenting my myogenic syndrome is actually done in this document. I have included it in its entirety because it would be a waste to redo it on this page.
The Word 